Saturday, September 30, 2006
back and smiling (:
BOO HOO...
im falling sick...
and i dun care about what i eat...
as usual, chili padi/curry/coconut/choco??
BUT, its getting reli bad...
hopefully its the 5-days type and not longer...
TODAY
just home from Khengling's house, cottage meeting...
before that, early in the morning...
i was in AJC for the amaths revision course...
met rykiel and baoren there...
had lunch and went to church...
reached early to play piano...
didnt know dajie and her sister was rather early too...
dilly dallied until 2.40pm then thai class started...
was fun... i love singing songs, so much nicer if its challenging...
SO SORRY, i grew up and learn to survive only on competition... HAHAX!
and then justin never break his promise...
whahahx at least today i know, that its not in the blood whahax
i think u know what i mean... :P
and then we revised old stuff,
to internalise it eh?
and also dajie officially confirmed that she would purposely set harder qns and stuff to make me blur...
BUT HEY, i will learn fast and not be blur by 071206!!
and then i sumhow ended up in a quarrel with my mum...
i think this time is quite my fault...
unfortunately things got bigger and this part is reli her fault... HAIZ!
i guess its like i expected at least my mum to wait for me while i finish my song at the piano in the yf room...
but she didnt, well nobody did... partly because we were late for yf i think...
but worse still, nobody cared whether i got out of church...
only when the bus is coming, then my mum can start to worry whether i board the bus...
which i made no effort to chase and would have easily skipped it...
but the bus decided to reach only at the exact moment i was at the busstop, so fine!
and then cottage meeting was fun,
food was nice... really
i learned more thai secretly during msg... whahax
and i know how to write the curly-wurglies already ok! (HAHAZ,onli some!)
and then justin is grumbling and sulking all day again... that i keep suaning him...
UNFORTUNATELY, he's more rightbrained to left...
and i was anti-RIGHT, ok that sounds nasty...
put it nicely, i was alienating rightbrained guys... i cant say gurls cauz everybody is mostly right! ARGHX!
shit, i think i made it sound nastier... i should just forget it...
but considering he isnt like major rightbrained... at least still got some left, so not so anti lorhx... whahax!
so my sister is also sickk...
and my dad brought her clinic-hunting all night??!
and well, i hope she gets better... whhax her eoy is next week ya noe!
jiayou...
--------------------------------------------------------------=-=-=-=
RIGHTBRAINERS...
its not exactly as if im trying to alienate them...
its just that i get pretty IRRITATED and totally GIVEUP...
trying to communicate with RIGHTBRAINERS, sometimes...
ESPECIALLY those at home..
and partly because those at home are alienating the LEFTBRAINERS at home!
that's harsh too u know...
and its just how minds dun think alike...
and how sensitivity becomes subjective...
and how understanding levels are gaping like crazy...
that i just give up totally sometimes...
and u can really conclude that i blame arguments and quarrels on the difference in brain usage..
because its almost becoming true... arghx!
------------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
LEFT BEHIND I, II, III
it really a nice nice series...
although its man's perception in a way...
because we cant see the future...
but i think its really interesting sometimes to see how faith works...
and how a group of such friends can root you deeper...
and catch you before you fall...
anyway, i miss the showing of it at the church sanctuary in the other year...
its really fun and exciting to know how many people gets to see it...
-------------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
Cottage meeting
its been quite awhile since ive rejoined the yf...
tight schedules and all...
aiz...
but the thing was i sort of cried during the first song...
i actually knew why, but now i dont remember anymore...
its not just the song, and loving to sing such songs...
but more than that... deeper and into the bond...
and much more than all this... arh, nevermind...
----------------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
my results are really cruel, and i dunno where to find strength...
like not just spiritual...
but rather renewed strength and joy and interest and encouragement and motivation...
to strive even harder for Os...
anyway, a headache is on the way...
i suggest that i go to bed soon...
besides, i have been sneezing like nuts all day...
under a fan, like a row in an hour...
but in a stuffy crappy room, like a row every 10mins!
its reli horrible to keep sneezing for nothing...!arghx!
becca (: ♥
8:50 PM
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
farewell and blehx
choco choco cake!!! waahahax... big and nice... and creamy lehhs... but full of meaning... (:
snapshot AGAIN! whahax... learnt to polish my skills a long long time ago... whahax...
Justina and me and Lynn... my two juniors... lucky got them pei wo teach the younger juniors...
and until today i still never pump you two la... count me nice (:
but so sorry, i didnt do my best in teaching you two in secondary one... because then, im only sec 2...!
my shiny shiny horn... my first and last foto of me and my horn... *sadx*
--------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
Forrest Gump
what a meaningful show...
sad... sweet... and strong... wahhax 3 Ss...
reminded me of how when u dun haf what others do...
all u want is the simple things of life like going to sch or whatever...
and well, the simplicity of life...
and the feather is so JoyLuckClub-y
whahax, full-circle...
-----------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
Chemistry
blehx...
my prelim practical is like...
what a reli nice result... (:
but well, i dun boast, unlike some people, and unlike other people who think i owaes do...
but anyway i dint have the mood...
BUT... saddest is that i didnt have the right attitude...
and chemistry affects me most...
though i have gotten over the chem-affects-most part...
but, im still angry with myself that i let mrsteo down...
BECAUSE OF ONE FREAKING ATTITUDE...
waliaox, and my mood suddenly changed...
i duno why somemore la...
and then i dint reli care about company or whatsoever...
i just needed to get home and chill out doing anything else better than idling...
so when the guys cornered me for donations at yck,
i was like no and i meant no...
and i din care about giving excuses,
i-din-feel-like-it-and-u-better-bother-me attitude...
had bubbletea to cheer me up...
surprisingly, the ice mocha was bitter like crazy to my mum...
but damn sweet to me... wahahahxs
im crazy already...
"set leew"
---------------------------------------------=-=-=
Thai
i think thai language is reli fun...
after all i've always wanted to talk alien lang... whahax!
well, considerably i faked it all in my childhood...
unfortunately,
there are few left brains to have fun with...
oh but justin is coming next week...
at least he promised to... and he promised to keep his promise ok!
however, he's only 60% left and 40% right... saddx... whahahx!
---------------------------------------------=-=-=
Debate (for sunday sch)
i dunno why im doing it...
and im like having tuition somemore...
maybe i'll get someone to help me present it...
BUT, im responsible ok...
im already halfway through...
and im trying to sound enthu la whahahx...
anyway, genetics is not all that boring...
however, im so against it somehow...
but i have to sit through dunno how many lessons on it mann!
(eng/geog and what more? bio?)
---------------------------------------------------=-=-=
gtg le...
bye~ciaos~baileew~zaijian~zhaoliao
becca (: ♥
7:52 PM
Monday, September 25, 2006
HAIZ!!!
LOCKOUT
HAIZ!!! my sister just locked us out of our bedroom...
issue is NOT about sleeping OUTSIDE...
issue IS... my fone and everything is INSIDE...
now, she's getting pretty frustrated eh...
$45 bucks for one locksmith lehs...
anyway i reli hope i get to go in soon...
its just LUCKY of us that the air-con main power is in another room...
because we left the aircon on-ed when we got locked out...
haiz...
-----------------------------------------------=-=-=
PROM
im relireli sad that i cant go...
but well, im OVER with getting sad for a feww days...
im strong, will be though...
we'll still meet, no big deal...
loads of fun i'll miss...
but PLEASE, dun provoke me on that..
if not, BISH off u go... and im serious...
BUT, i promise, i WILL get loads of prezzies for ONLY
those who do not forget me!
WHAHAHAX, if not, i'll surely forget about you instantaneously, somehow... LOL
-------------------------------------------------=-=-=
RIGHT-BRAINERS... GUYS...
im super duper sorry...
but i just distinctively clarify myself today morning...
i used to dunno how i differentiate this/that guys...
but now i know... and its a fact since a long time ago...
i go eeky at RIGHT-BRAINED GUYS... "ewww"
soooryyy larhx... after all im a left-brain so cannot blame me...
have some examples around lerhx... so cannot blame lorhx...
but its hard to describe how i guess, i just know it...
for example, they are like very indecisive...
oops i let out a secret, leftbrains are domineering but can be controlled...
or another example, childish BEYOND MEASURE...
aiya dunno how to describe, eh bu zheng qi? or eh, bu zi liang li!
not streetsmart?... sorry this part of me is sort of right-brained... hahax
and i can say this straight right now,
only because i have to perfect images in my mind of RIGHTBRAINED GUYS...
EWWWWWW....
------------------------------------------=-=-=
ok i got to go now... DINNER LEHX... (: byeee
becca (: ♥
7:20 PM
Thursday, September 21, 2006
spell SAD...
today has become a reli SAD day for me...
spell S-A-D...
oh mann... im gonna sulk so much...
=============================-=-=~~
FIRST,
why did you have to bring that up!?!!?
YOU... arghx... and somemore so open la... waliaox arghx
especially when its after PRELIMS...
and im DESPERATELY trying to feel happy before the epidemic strikes!
THANKS ARH... reli thanks...
(i know what the answer will be, but sorry im not in the right mind to speak about that just this minute...)
SECOND,
why did PROM NITE... have to be on 27TH NOV???
WHY?!?!?! why on earth that day...
FARNI AR... its like please... can i enjoy my trip to HK?!?!
damn... i hate it mann...
---------------------------------------------------=-=-=
oh mann... thinking about today reli is going to make me cry...
sorry for being WEAK...
but i AM WEAK inside...
well, friends OR family?
haiz anyway, forget it...
i should just like disappear...
its like even a movie cant cheer me up for $8bucks...
imagine... whats with me mann...
at least i knew Phantom of The Opera did really made me smile...
but John Tucker Must Die only made me feel worse...
its quite nice but maybe not worth 8 bucks...
but the worse is only because my day is really saddened enough...
---------------------------------------------=-=-=
oh sharkx... i feel reli sad...
but its okay...
because a left brain must be strong no matter what...
we are independent...
and nobody will stop letting us down...
we must stand for ourselves...
we live on our own...
its okay when the world goes the other way i guess...
BUT sorry, im really not cut in the correct character for the perfect left-brain...
agrhx... my life is downed... like seriously downnnneddd!
and i reli dunwan to sound dramatic because i seriously HATE COPYCATS...
but imagine urself in that kind of thing la?
------------------------------------------------=-=-=
->FIRST,
its never a HABIT... its not some Desperation... its not the Hopefulness... its not any Wishfull thinking...
its just me and my life... and that NON-understanding... and HIS wonderful crapp... AND-- i need time... just a bit more... but please... be more sensitive, although i know guys are not, and that leftbrainers arent any sensitive in that sense?... but well, im me now...
-> SECOND,
its not the foood... nor the games nor the dresscode...
ITS the PEOPLE... its the MEMORY... its LIFE... its commonness... its the BOND...
i so reli feel like disappearing from the surface of the Earth...
after all, no earthly beings really care... do they?
like even if they do... they dun reli understand...
its really hard to be independent...
i came online to blog... but now, i feel as if i blogged crap...
and with no more sense to add here... so, im gonna go right now... BYE
becca (: ♥
6:18 PM
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
PRELIMS ARE OVER....
so i came here at 2342hrs... on WED 20/09/06...
TO ANNOUNCE THE DEPARTURE OF OUR BELOVED PRELIMS!
im soo HAPPY...
NOT the results part...
but while its arrival isnt soon enough...
im HAPPY that the crazy part is over...
NOT totally but at least for now...
suddenly feel like no purpose to go home...
nothing to do...
whahax
================================-------=-=-=
TUESDAY
i went with fiona/jolene and wenqi/huili joined in...
to study amaths...
and we were at khatib Macs...
TRYING to do amaths...
Squeezing out the last of BRAIN juices...
and having IMPROPER MEALTIMES...
FOR LIKE 10HOURS!??!?! HECTIC MANN!
and i squeezed in bio one chapter overnight and no more maths...
so... im like sooo gonna FAIL! thankyou!
-------------------------------------------------=-=-=
WEDNESDAY
that's today...
yeah, last of papers for PRELIMs...
oso means LAST of the (2nd last try)...
sorry im so into maths suddenly... all about brackets but i cant find a better to sub-in that phrase!
and then huili/xueqing/daph...
was sooo prepared to watch a movie...
BUT... WE DIDNT CHECK THE TIMES nor THE SHOWS ON TODAY!
waliaox... so we had drinks at coffee Bean TAKA... and i had my very very FAVOURTIE caramel-pecan brownie... not cheap horx...
BUT... its mainly to comfort my disappointment...
i was like literally CRAVING FOR A MOVIE!!! and... there's nothing but horror films... ARGH!
now im bored and just watched Cinderella Story for my 4th or 5th time...
i can even memorise their speeches...
BUT... i learnt something new everytime i watch it...
SO... i still like the show...
And i think its quite a left-brain directed... to think of it... WHAHAHAX!
(basically, the predictability... when its so connected to the fairytale...)
and here's what i learnt... for today's...
"NEVER LET THE FEAR OF STRIKING OUT KEEP U FROM PLAYING THE GAME.."
how's that... fear dominates a person...
nobody escapes it...
because GOD dominates you...
and only HE is not scared of anything...
so accept it, YOU ARE WEAK! as in me too la... whahahax
*feeling guilty for teasing my sister for being weak... LOL*
so , this applies to me in a few ways currently...
ONE of which, is academic hindrances... like sadness/results/difficulty/laziness... BLEHX...
SECOND of which is my FEARS... whahax i can face them on reli HIGH days... BUT not others!
THIRD of which my past... everyone has a past... part of which CANT be PERFECT... so WELL...........
FOURTH of which WAS prayer... i felt relireli WEAKplus SHALLOW in that over the last week... GLAD its GONE!
FIFTH... thailand is dying... as in chaotic... and i reli DUNKAIRE bout chaos that doesnt involves me UNTIL, now...sad how we're suppose to go on a mission trip... BUT mum's NO-DIE attitude is like reli surprising to me and fits perfectly here... in a sense yea...
SIXTH?? shall stop at 5... the rest is CONFIDENTIAL... but u can knock into my BRAIN for it... because remember im quite... an EXTROVERT! whahahahx, my weakness mann...!
*hey but i reli do keep SECRETS well, know an extrovert well before u talk crapp okay?? LOL, i dont rattle off things that im like not 100% matters to me, u know... unlesss it regards LIFE-DEATH*
===========================-=-=-=
THE END ....
so... tmr which is in about 15hrs time...
here comes my MOVIE!
which is JOHN TUCKER MUST DIE!~~~
wahahx, i dunno nice anot...
i hope we catch it (:
and... im reli reli SAD...
that tmr we cant go PULAU UBIN after all..
i soo MISS SPEED RIDING...
take enough precaution and...
do it the left brain way...
hyperBUTcarefull... and FUN!
~cheers 'n' ciaoz~
becca (: ♥
11:45 PM
Monday, September 18, 2006
hmmx
nth much la...
just boredd..
and desperately counting to the end of prelims...
i reli reli expect my results to fluctuate again...
and i reli expect to cry for the 2nd last time...
oh mann...
my sciences are horrible this round... not the least bit of light in themm...
and my maths was surprisingly going to be better than fail...
i mean i HOPE...
-------------------------------------=-=-=
well, hope is a BIG word...
its the last thing u will have in spite of nothing else...
its not a matter, it doesnt take up space or memory...
but its in the heart and somewhere in btwn the virtual and real world...
it links fantasy with reality...
and appearance with reality...
and everything else...
that's why its a beautiful word... BUT a hard word...
and so its complicated... i told you, i should have lef t it at BIG...
---------------------------------------=-=-=
so today's is 4th last paper...
and it turned out great...
my mum said she prayed for a miracle...
and i said i blieve in miracles but definitely not for AMATHS!
and well, the miracle came... reli tiny one... but a meaningful one u know...
and well i reli reli hate making things up or likening things that happen to me to BIG stuff...
and if u know me, i rather deny...
but i can say that i felt God giving me the reassurance to go on in today's paper...
no i felt like tired and breaking out into the heckaire attitude...
but i got motivated to finish the paper regardless of what...
and i did it smoothly, without hesitation to skip and to do whatever i can...
AND... i completed the paper satisfied with my answers 15minutes before time!~
think about it, how does that sound to a girl who has never completed maths papers usually...
and with my mum nagging about how she could in primary sch... u laugh... but its true that she blieves i could do it now if i could do it then... HAIZ..
----------------------------------------=-=-=
yesterday...
i got finally rather pissy at my mum...
she can attitude us the way she likes it...
and we suffer..??
i damn hate ATTITUDES like this...
for fun once in a while is OKAY...
but for like serious matters or out-of-the-blue... i HATE IT mann...
so my dad got infected and things got real CRAZY...
ok its got nothing to do with getting scolded or not...
its just the unfairness/ childishness/ non-understanding... BLEHX
my mum was going to the Gospel musical to get ideas for thai trip..
BUT my sister dint know she wasnt suppose to go...
and i wanted to tag along...
but my mum crapped about PURPOSES...
and dinner was DESTROYED... damn sour...
when its suppose to be celebrating my finishing of one Amaths paper in 3DAYS, and with 14out of 27qns WRONG!
i know the truth is bittered enough...
but my mum promised a nice dine-out like so one-second ago...
and things crapped when she started getting grumpy FOR NOTHING...
haiz, i guess im not the only one with family problems..
but its reli unbearable to be like that..
whole day comm. prob and no understanding for each other... and just keep wanting our ways...
sometimes, i get reli frustrated and make things reli worse...
of course i die la... haiz but whatever...
-----------------------------------------------=-=-=
well, anyway gonna go do bio lerhx...
jiayou... i think 4h is the class with the most papers left!
eh. 8 subjects lehhs...whahahahx anyway jiayou! (:
becca (: ♥
1:00 PM
Friday, September 15, 2006
studying and non-study achievemts!
well...
im here to blog againn...
because i think im feeling high...
rather im feeling HOT... as in really temperature prob la
because i was in the rain for more than an hour...
and THANKS a million to some unappreciative people... aka mum & sister!!!!
-----------------------------------------=-=-=
was so satisfied... eh not like perfectly but avgly rather...
with my phy-bio paper 1...
and my satisfication is easy to gather!
just let me have a PEACE of mind to finish the paper in time!
but actually im just very happy i did efficient scanning through memory work for BIO...
although i skipped revising like the micro-org chapt... ( my fav)
i like those bio chapt with relation to chem... or food? or something la whahahahx!
-> micro-org.--- YOGHURT! cheese! MILK! bread?? eww...
-> respiration--- fermentation
hahah all the ORGANIC CHEM!
*its reli a wonder how i can just dun hate chem no matter how sad it made it feel*
--------------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
ok so on WEDNESDAY...
i met evon at wdlands mrt and went to amk library to meet issac
whahahx we were like late ... he because she's late whahahx..
and then i got pretty-addicted to MATHS...
can u believe it??
never in my life of this 4 years... have i been addicted to MATHS!
and then we went home at about 7pluz..
oh yea and met biefoo they all there too...
---------------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
MUSIC is ruling my life once again...
im like so abstaining from MUSIC for like ages...
partly is no time...
but mostly... is that i dunwan poison my brain
and waste the RAM i need for exam...
i so miss it mann...
another thing... "O Lord, Your Tenderness"
dajie send me the song's chorus kept ringing in my head every exam!
duno why but i suddenly seem happy about...
i guess it has something to do with the short message on 107FM that my mum switched on after the morning run on Wednesday morning...
-> something about prayer's strength...
-> faith... and not failing... and how not to fail... and why we fail...
THAT answered half of my qns from Monday... HAIZ!
----------------------------------------------------=-=-=
well, so PRELIMS are going to be over soon...
I AM SOOO GLADD...!
well, hermmxxx
i know half of this prelims are reli dead le...
but i also know half of it made me happy...
but most of all, I KNOW ITS GOING TO BE OVER!
4 more papers... after that will be guai le!
just noticed something from this PRELIMS...
-> with full concn... i can finish memorising everything i need for BIO in 2hrs...
-> I HAVE TO PRACTICE EVERY SINGLE SUBJECT B4 I GET INTO THE HOPEFUL MOOD OF PASSING!
-> i can addicted to anything almost as easily... (studying/ piano/music/tv/comp w or wo internet!...)
-> i still will love chem...
-> God is still with me...
-> and that i have alot of movies to catch up with!!
WHAHAHAX... and that every alternative gd/bad paper i sit for... IT WILL RAIN! like dogs/cats/monkeys...
-------------------------------------------------=-=-=
well, so i got to get out off here le...
before i talk *hoii*
-hoii = crabb in teochew... weehhex
becca (: ♥
8:20 PM
studying and non-study achievemts!
becca (: ♥
8:20 PM
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
PRELIMs...
siian here are the exams infront of me...
and... i still can blog..
guess what i just found out recently?
BLOGS ARE USELESS...
waahahx... BECAUSE...
because... u cant literally write ur mind out in there...
some things are just simply CONFIDENTIAL...
and for that part... im LOUSY... because im 75% extrovert-ic ...
so great... i wont blog so often anymore...
after all people dun read blogs to absorb SADNESS...
they read them for fun/laughter/peace/and JOY!
contradicts eh? well, damn sad la...
i just realise i dun have a confidante...
as in PERMANENT CONFIDANTE...
i guess extroverts dun... SO SAD... haiz...
when that part of me is right brain... extroverts do need one too... HAIZ!!
--------------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
my block is getting repainted...
and its a weird and ugly color...
my house is in diff shades of green supposedly...
EWWW...
i prefer baby colours.... baby blue or baby green...
but that's for the 5th or 6th floor barhx...
HAIX!
i reli reli thought of complaining to the RC... but sad la...
i only teenager... whaqhax
anyway, the issue is that...
there's like NO privacy!
they can see through every open window when the scale up the building!
even the toilet mann! HAIZ!
but lucky our window is closed and is frosted!
---------------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
chem paper really made me cry buckloads...
ARGHX!
it wasnt about the difficulty of it...
but i relireli felt that i let down mrsteo
like personally... HAIX...
and then i hated my attitude towards the paper...
taking for granted that i had ttime...
that i didnt do my best...
that i didnt practised hard enough...
that i totally let chem down itself...
that i didnt even practised...
only memory work of for-grantedness...
its like so damn saddddddddddd!!!!
until i cant recover...
and nearly got the hysterics... CRAP!
----------------------------------------------------=-=-=
its like maths was a COMFORT!
not that its easy...
but i had confidence...
and i wasnt nervous...
i was NORMAL... perfectly normal...
and that i finally managed to finish the paper...!!!
yay... not that i know how to do everything...
but do u see it?
its the beginning of my encouragement...
gedit?
im soo HAPPY
--------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
and THANKYOU DAJIE!
"HE is always with you!"
this struck me honestly... dunno why so sudden...
because i reli reli felt ignored by Him...
and alone to face what He wants to put me through
and that its perfectly normal to lack confidence and get moody...
when we dunt do our papers with confidence
whahaxc
--------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
yay... tmr gonna meet evon to do maths!
haiz... i reli hope i sort things out...
both in my brain and with my studies...
well... im currently VERY HUNGRY NOW... and its like 4.45pm...
not lunch not dinner... what the...
well gtg le... ciaos!
becca (: ♥
4:28 PM
Monday, September 04, 2006
how does so many differences ever get concealed under one roof?
how does so many differences ever get concealed under one roof?
i honestly wonder...
just curious about the conditions humans are made to survive in... blehx!
However... i bet its like almost applicable in every other place...
-> sch
-> home
-> work
i guess humans are therefore meant to be independent to a certain extent lorhx... HAIZ...
as i mentioned before...
nobody can ever absolutely understand anybody right?
except GOD barhx!
therefore, we need acceptance like countless times...
and we dismiss anger and hatred and frustration and jealousy...
but somehow, we err and this comes in because its reli reli unbearable to fall into miscomm and such like this..
sorry this post is gonna be naggy...
=-=-=-------------------------------o-o-o
my sister...
you say her stupid she will dumbly say...
" im stupid, thankyou..." or " yeh so?.. i dont mind" or " yeh im stupid so dont make me study.."
what the...
sometimes...
i reli reli wish the age gap is smaller...
then she can faster growup larhx!
then she doesnt need to act like a pampered kid...
or a retarded... just to gain sympathy...
her attitude also breeded different expectations lorhx...
so its like im expected to score 'A'.. and she can be understood if she doesnt pass...
what the... i reli reli hate this... its not only biasness... that i cant live with...
she escapes being lazy!
well, but today she rather turns on a deaf ear about doing something about her studies...
she watches tv without feeling guilty...
she finds excuses of all sorts and gets away... OH MANN...
as long as its something to do with studying... she wins... how i wish she dint...
and today... she's reading her Lit book...
and she grumbled that cmmntest was unseen and she dint know...
and i was like she should listen in class at least to this minimum...
and that eoy & midyr is usually bk and the rest is unseen...
and she says im loso-ing... when i havent even said more than a sentence... SERIOUS!
i dunno what i gonna do about it mann...
sometimes i feel ive not done my part as a sister...
why other younger siblings have better guidance?
like they reli GROWUP... like literally have cmmn sense... oh mann!
and how come some younger siblings reli understand what jie/kor is talking about...
and they can enjoy studying together...
or understand why each other has to... instead of making them not to study...
=-=-=----------------------------------o-o-o
my mum...
i seriously... have learned...
if i have a point to put across... i reli reli argue...
and without any idea of embarrassment of wherever am i...
sounds kinda horrible of me... but serious...
that's the part of me being extrovert barhx! LOLX
BUT... accept it or not... its a fact...
well, anyway its like sometimes i wonder how come she grumbles about insensitivity...
but ownself becomes outright insensitive in a literal meaning...
okay, well... i am also insensitive in a certain kind of way...
but well... i guess i expected my mum to reli become a role model...
just that i omitted flawlessness... haiz...
so , she promised a beef stew dinner...
and just because she got addicted to drama serials... she just broke her promise...
sometimes its reli the truth of what i feel that her rxns of little have amounted to our insensitivity like breaking tiny promises of returning home late
and, she doesnt see it... im just using this as an example of gap of differences...
that she doesnt understand i whine not because i love to...
but it matters... even if its about ONE dinner...!
well, sometimes i reli reli tried my best to switch off to the earful of differences....
and overhere, i mean the earful of effects and aftermath of a dangerous blast of it...
and it reli happens...
but sometimes im reli fully blown off... and i dont know what to do..
waiting to tide it over is SO typical of me...
and my dad will kill anyone who sparks off one...
luckily, its subsided over the years of my childhood...
anyway, i wasnt deprived okay...
but its like till today, there's still a teeny bit of that recessive gene in her i guess...
which seriously came from my grandma... but its none of my business...
and okay the point is this leads to quarrels too...
ones that hurts and i recover fast, really... but they will still surface somewhat, somehow... and ALWAYS!
AND... im tired...
that's why i start to accept it the way it is...
sounds negative but its really effective i guess...
after all this is a common trend in all human beings...
BUT... i beg YOU... to listen more to YOUR children... SERIOUS!
racheal put that point across once... and if it continues... YOU will REGRET...
its just factually correct...
=-=-=----------------------------------o-o-o
sorry i just needed to let go...
reli sorry for breaking my promise about grumbling over here again...
i wont like crapp so much again...
well, i wasnt crapping... just thoughts i reli needed to get out of my mind...
before i reli burst...
=-=-=--------------------------------------------------------=-=-=
im SO HAPPY with LITERATURE!
im like almost done with JLC
and after i read finish EOTP...
i can reli say i study finish le...
*arghx, i guess reading JLC has make me read deeper into every other strybk or speech or thought next time... THANKYOU LIT!*
and im going to rejuvenate strength into my studies again!
(ok i dunno if i used that wrd correctly... LOL)
-i must think far- i must think far-
(hoping this works in lightening the load of burdens and problems) whahax
gtg lehx... ciaos!
becca (: ♥
5:54 PM
Sunday, September 03, 2006
im bored...
and still im bored...
BUT THE MOST FRUSTRATING THING IS...
that ive stopped studying...
and starting to get addicted to the net & korean drama serials again...!!!!
ONE WORD... CRAP!
well but i know i did try to stop it from starting!
1: my mum wanted to buy the changjin serial! (i was opposing...)
2: in the end she reli buy... and we watched...
3: we started on Save Your Last Dance For Me!
4: then we continued with My Name Is Kim SamSoon...
And then aunty angela is so nice to keep us in addiction...
5: we got stucked with Only You...
6: now Fullhouse!!
7: ??? Princess Hour???
And i guess this will never end... right through O levels... WHAT A TEMPTATION!!!
so .... its still not my fault ok...
=-=-=--------------------------------------------------=-=-=
well, im reli reli stagnant into studying...
well, at least NEAR stagnant...
ok, to make it sound better...
im trying to read fast but into detail... JOY LUCK CLUB!!
AND... my sister got addicted to it somehow!
so now she's challenging me to read faster...
CRAP! because i reli reli cant...
that's why i hate reading...
GEDIT?
and whatsmore... i heckaire EOTP le.... whahax
=-=-=--------------------------------------------------=-=-=
so... my weekend is a mundane one...
seriously nothing much...
but i reli dunno why i keep laughing at nothing speciall LOL...
ok here's the first...
NCC guy ranging from sec1 nerddeesss to sec3 ok-looking eh...
BUT guess what they were doing?
FLAG DAY, BINGO...
i dunno but i felt that it was prettty dumb...
after all it dashed my impression of NCC as a prestigious something?
-> the guys were carrying Yellow Ribbon GAYEE goody bags!!! EEW...
-> there were plumppy guys that were sparked of my first laugh of eating alot... SORRY!
-> they were 99% guys... from schools from all over singapore coming to Wdlands mrt station just for this in No.4... OH MANN! the gurls are smart i guess...
=-=-=-----------------------o-o-o
well, secondly...
JLC strybk had something about Jingmei having a Peterpan haircut... in Two Kinds
and with explicit descriptions...
somehow i just had to laugh...
and it happened quite a few times because they keep refering to it!
so i got stuck reading that paragraph for about half hour barhx...
AND ITS RELI MY SISTER'S FAULT!!!
she just keep making me remember that...
and we just couldnt stop breaking up... reli silly mann...
=-=-=-----------------------o-o-o
my dad had one of he's crazy days today...
reli very joker siah!
suddenly he and my sister came to me...
he put his hand very near me...
and i thought he wanted to show me something...
and i know that if anything, it would be an insect...!
and then, he keep putting it closer...
then i scared... and i started screaming before he even scared me with that STUPID TOY!!!!
and we couldnt stop laughing at my dumbness...
until my mum came over to see what happned...
AND... she also, got caught by it...
damn LAME!!!
and we didnt stop laughing till very much later...!! "
=-=-=-----------------------------------------------------=-=-=
okok, i reli got to go...
tmr still got practical...
and if u know me well...
i reli dun care about practicals... at this kind of mood...
but if anything...
I WILL CARE... iF---
it is chem... just about anything to do with it... whahahx!
so cyall soon tmr...
*and btw, church was great as usual...
only freaking cold from where we sat...
and that justin finally apologised for his gang bully at me of suaning him! WHAHAX!
and that i kena pangsehed for lunch! because people either went home early to STUDY! or went to eat already or was taking their own sweeeeet time! -irritated-
and well, my mum pangsehed me at home... if not i could have went to dajie's house... when i mugged reli hard for one hour for practical tmr! EVIL...
SO, as YOU can SEE... im IN a GOODY good MOOD today! SO dunt EVER destroy IT too SOON... otherwise YOU will REALLY gedit... GEDIT? (blehx!)
becca (: ♥
9:29 PM
snapshot AGAIN! whahax... learnt to polish my skills a long long time ago... whahax...
Justina and me and Lynn... my two juniors... lucky got them pei wo teach the younger juniors...